Doors Closing

After a lot of fuss and fanfare, the DC Metro's new "Doors Closing" voice is...a letdown. They hyped the "tryouts" so much (YOU can be the voice of the Metro!!1!!111!), it was bound to be. I was really hoping it would be Pierce Brosnan saying, "Hello Marge....Doors Closing" (If you didn't get that, you missed that episode of The Simpsons) or an angry dude yelling "Get out the way!". Instead, it's another ordinary woman, but they've beefed up her script. She now goes into an overly-verbose (for a door chime) monologue on moving out of the way and heading to the center of the car. And what used to be a two-tone chime now sounds like an impatient person ringing your doorbell twice and leaving a bag of flaming dog poop on your porch. I think they should have given up the voice altogether and done what they do in Paris and Milan (maybe the rest of Europe too, but I haven't been to the rest of Europe)--a loud, obnoxious buzzer/horn that says "your arm will get crushed if you don't move"! Even someone who doesn't speak the language knows what that means! Add some cartoons on the doors showing bunnies getting their fingers pinched, and you've got some tourist-friendly public transportation.